::the final stretch::
the a divs are finally here... or at least just ard the corner... what we've been training so hard for...
haiz... nervous yet excited... cannot wait for nxt week and yet wish that it will never come....
so contradictory... but yupps.. that's how i feel...
NYJC will be playing in the grp stages with PJC, RJC, JJC and SRJC....
we had the chance to be the first people to wear the new forest green canter jerseys... so cool... it was damn nice having that privilege....

::affected?::
haiz.. think i'm getting affected by everything piling up... esp at this time... btwn the trainings, there isn't really time to do any homework... i guess i'm guilty of being a tad lazy... okay fine.. truthfully.. i'm being REALLY lazy... but can't help it... don't get enuf quality sleep at night, zonk thru sch, get home to eat dinner and then TRY to sleep... i'm just there in body but not in mind and spirit...

i kinda have some kind of idea of what i want to do after JC, but i just don't know where to start... what is required for me to enter the course, the scope of the courses that i'm interested in, etc... i guess i still have a bit of research to do...

but mostly, i'm really being hindered by my dilemma... i don't know what to do... there is so many things involved... i don't wanna just step out and imagine that i don't have feelings for her... but at the same time... haiz... dunnoe how to put it.....

::stoned::
i just feel like sitting in a corner of sch and stoning... pretending to be brain dead.... every now and then, i'd get up and act mentally unsound(not too tough for me), freak everyone out then go back to being a vegetable...
it would be nice to be able to just sit there without a care in the world, not bothering abt the nxt maths assignment test or finishing the latest physics tutorial... without having to plan for the future and just be there living for the present and talking whatever comes ur way....
to have a bunch of friends who will stone with you forever that you can crap with....
life's full of worries... i'm not saying that it won't be... cuz it is....
but it's nice having dreams isn't it....

::the ways of the sith::
i'd like to stand up during common lunch and shout F*** OFF at the top of my lungs to let off steam... of course there are alot of undesired repercussions that come with doing such a thing.. that's what keeps me sitting down quietly in a corner. brewing up like a pressure cooker...
it's been a long long time since i've been really truly madly deeply ANGRY with someone... i mean red hot angry... i feel the urge to shout or deck someone that i don't like... haiz... i know it's wrong... but it is quite refreshing...
nooo... anger leads to hate and hate leads to suffering.. that is the path to the dark side... i cannot allow myself to fall to the temptations of the dark side...
okay... so that's getting a bit lame... but it's my blog... i'll write what i want....